Possible list

Hi. This is different from what my writing style on this page used to be. This is just an update. It’s still unplanned though. Just a bunch of my thoughts and emotions on a page.

I’m an avid oversharer.

Oversharer (noun): a person who has no filter on how much about their lives that they share. They will tell everyone about that time that they ate a durian and almost puked. They will tell everyone about their deepest traumas and about that time that they got their first piercing. They will tell everyone everything just to fill up space in the silence or because they just can’t stop talking. And then they will regret telling everyone everything and be left with their embarrassment and vow to never tell anyone anything anymore. And then they will tell everyone how they hate being an oversharer.

I already forgot why I started writing this. Oh right, just look at the title.

A couple years ago, I wrote an “impossible list”. It was filled with things I wished I could do in my lifetime. But of course, I didn’t write every actual desire on there that I thought was impossible. I had to have some secrets and well, those things weren’t as exciting.

So here’s the impossible list items that I can finally strikethrough, and some that I’m still working on.

Someone actually married me.

I graduated with my bachelor’s degree.

I finished my Honour’s Project.

I made my parents (somewhat) proud.

I got my first tattoos.

I am not an insomniac anymore.

I didn’t cry in front of anyone at work (yet).

I can work with people without getting nervous.

Actually make time for / text back my friends.

Write something creative every month.

These past couple of years have been very fulfilling but also, I’ve put my creativity to the back burner and in its place, I focused on stability: financially, professionally, and personally. But I’ve come to realise that I don’t have to risk my sanity in order to be creative. Sure, the sadness and instability did help me write more but it didn’t necessarily mean better. And maybe, I can write to encourage others instead.

Ew. I’m not used to writing to positively. The urge to self deprecate is strong. It’s a coping mechanism okay? But I’ll get better at it.